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  • Writer's pictureKatlyn Roberts

PMS Jitters Got You Down? Yell At Your Mom

Updated: Jan 28, 2020

And other healthy outlets.

Photo by Omar Lopez on Unsplash

Ladies and people with lady bits, I don’t know about you, but my favorite time of the month is that period right before my uterine wall starts shedding and my muscles contract and blood comes out of my vagina. When my estrogen is sky-high, my anxiety is through the roof, and everyone around me can tell. Why is it my favorite?

Because it’s a time when the veil comes down from my eyes and I can see my life for what it really is — a big, stinking, terrifying, irritating pile of crap.

That’s right. Remember that feeling of euphoria you felt when you were ovulating? Remember how sexy you felt? How everything in your life seemed to be exactly the way it should be? How you forgave yourself easily and moved on from mistakes? How you felt good about where you were on the journey of life and weren’t too bothered with where you were going or where you’d been? How you had extraordinary patience with everyone? Remember how inspired you felt?

Fuckin’ lies. Tricky hormones. Deception chemicals.

This week… this is when you truly see the word for what it is. You’re not sexy, you’re a bloated, acne-covered mess. Nothing is ok, mistakes are forever, the journey is an obstacle course filled with danger at every turn and no end in sight, people are out to get you/constantly judging you, and what even isinspiration? You’ll probably never create anything of any worth ever again.

Why is this reality and not that?

Same reason that was reality and not this.

We’re living in the fuckin’ moment, ladies. Ground yourself. Live your now.

I thought it might be helpful to create a list of things that my PMS-addled brain has told me are very helpful during this time of the month. Just in case I’m inherently better at this than you are and you need someone telling you what to do right now. So get your highlighters ready because you’re definitely going to want to come back to these tips month after month after month after month …after month.


(To read the rest of this article, check it out where it was originally published in Pickle Fork.)

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