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  • Writer's pictureKatlyn Roberts

If You’re Not a Freelance Writer Now…

Updated: Jan 19, 2020

… you will be by the time you’re done reading this.

Photo by Siala on Pixabay.

Are you tired of living with your parents and ignoring emails from FedLoan? Have you been “working on a podcast” for two years now? When you tell people you’re a writer, do your friends occasionally voice the realization that they’ve never actually read anything you’ve written?

Dude. Me too.

I’ve been a freelance writer for 6 months now and nobody asked my opinion on this topic but that’s only because they haven’t had the chance. So if you’re ready to hear some practical, ready-to-apply advice, read this blog by experienced freelance blogger, Carol Tice.

If you’re stalling because you’re afraid to put yourself out there emotionally and professionally, let’s do this.

1. Write a bunch of fan fiction no one will ever see.

Mimicking the voices of people who followed their dreams and succeeded is one of the best ways to start a bunch of stories that you’ll never have to finish. It’s also a great way to waste time on work you’d never be caught dead sending to a publisher unless your name is Stephenie Meyer, E. L. James, or Cassandra Clare.

You may even get a sick thrill from going back to your old stories and seeing that HexOnTheBeach09 is beside herself that you never wrote another chapter. She’ll never know what happens after Luna Lovegood publicly declares her love for Dobby in order to show Ron and Hermione that it’s not so hard to share your feelings. As the mysteriously MIA author, you may know exactlywhat hijinks would have ensued but, for Merlin’s sake, don’t upload that final chapter. You’re too old for that baby stuff.

2. Post detailed analyses of popular movies and television on Facebook.

This is your chance to remind everyone from high school that your BA in screenwriting means that you’re still destined for great things even though you currently do administrative work for your parents’ medical practice. Your move to LA that you bragged about publicly may have fallen through after that miraculously-won meeting with that big-time tv producer ended up making you feel sexualized, objectified, and dejected, but the #metoo movement is coming for that guy and in the meantime, you can contemplate what it means to be a badass feminist who doesn’t let a man get in the way of her dreams and goals.

3. Spend twenty minutes writing the perfect tweet, then delete it.

Any writer will tell you — Twitter is where you’ll find jobs, it’s where you can showcase your ability to get your point across succinctly, it’s where presidents are made. Twitter is a necessity and there’s nothing you can do about it so suck it up and shoot for at least five shareable nuggets of content a day and if that seems like a lot, then you clearly don’t have anything to say.

If you’re worried about making a mistake, don’t. Nobody’s actually reading your tweets.

Follow me! @initiateabroad.

UPDATE: Holy shit, Alex Borstein is reading my tweets.

4. Let your friends and family know what you’re up to.

They may have a paid gig for you and you may be able to get a testimonial out of it but probably you’ve been trying so hard to look like you absolutely love your current life and job that they’re going to be a little surprised you’re asking them for help. That’s ok. Push through. The more embarrassing it is to start a new life, the less likely it is that you’ll chicken out down the road. And if nobody responds? ….Yeah, that sucks. I dunno, man. Delete your facebook?


(To read the rest of this article, check out where it was originally published in The Writing Cooperative.)

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